Friday 8 February 2013

On going to the food hall

HOMOSIMIAN WALKS INTO A STORE AND TAKES ESCALATOR DOWN TO FOOD HALL

BUNCH OF LOVELY GREEN LEAVES AT BOTTOM OF ESCALATOR, ORANGES, AND OTHER LOVELY STUFF

 HOMOSIMIAN (HS) THOUGHT BUBBLE: *LIGHTBULB MOMENT* I WOULD REALLY FANCY SOME SOUP FOR DINNER. HOW ABOUT THAT CHORIZO AND KALE SOUP THAT I'VE MADE A FEW TIMES? MAYBE I SHOULD SEE IF THEY HAVE CAVALO NERO!




HS: Do you have cavalo nero (sees dark leaved veg that could be cavalo nero at the back of the veg stand)

Woman1: What is cavalo nero?

HS: Its known as black cabbage. It looks like Savoy cabbage but has big, dark green leaves.

Woman2: That is not cabbage (pointing at dark leaves). That is spinach.

HS: No, I know that is spin-

W1: Is this cavalo nero? (picks us celery)

HS: No, but-

W2: Spinach isn't cabbage. (points at spinach)

HS: I know, but th-

W1: Is this cavalo nero? (picks up artichoke)

HS: No, bu-

W2: You actually want broccolli rabe (points at broccolli rabe)

HS: Not really, its a type of g-

W1: cavalo nero? (thrusts asparagus at me)

HS: No! It's actua-

W2: You want thyme.

HS: Erm, no, bu-

W1: Here is cavalo nero! (gives me thyme)

HS: No! I don't want thyme, it looks like chard, but wrinkly, and dark....

W1: Here, cavalo nero! (thrusts chard at me)

HS: N-

W2: You want something green?

HS: Yes, but, I wa-

W1: Cavalo nero! (proffers spinach)



HS: That is spinach...

W2: Yes, we told you that is spinach. 

W1: H (holds up beets, hopefully) cavalo nero?

HS: No, no, no, I'll take the broccolli rabe instead, please.

W2 to W1: (in conspirational manner) I told you he wanted this but he didn't realise.

W1: VoilĂ , CAVALO NERO!! (hands me weighed bag of broccolli rabe).

HS: ... Thanks! (looks nonplussed)



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